Writing | Follow The Pull

Okay, lords and ladies, I want to throw my two cents into your hat or ring or shoe or whatever other metaphorical container you prefer I throw metaphorical change in. Just because you’re a published or self-published author does not mean you get to suddenly be an elitist butthole who can dictate what does or does not make a writer, what genres are and are not “real writing”, and what style is or isn’t “art”.

Now I’m not saying that we shouldn’t have standards for things like grammar (except for lovable scamps like Cormac McCarthy) and making things clean and readable for our audience, HOWEVER, what we do not have the license to do, as authors, is tell someone whether or not they’re a real writer.

Example: Yesterday I noticed a tweet from a self-published author that read as follow: “YouKnowYouAreAWriterWhen (it was a hashtag, pardon the unusual caps) you are constantly saying ‘I should write that down’.” My quote-unquote clever response to her was, “YouKnowYouAreAWriterWhen you have a dream that intelligent ducks enslave society, wake up and say, ‘I should write that down’.” Her response to my response was as follows: “Hah. Or maybe not….”

Now maybe I’m just reading too much into this, but that, ladies and gents, sure felt like I just got bitch slapped.

It just so happens that I actually AM working on a short story involving hyper intelligent ducks and class warfare (it’s less funny than it sounds), and it also so happens that I take offense to someone telling me what does or does not make me a writer. So what if I decide to write about ducks? Does that mean I can’t make an intelligent, thought provoking, entertaining piece about duck-human warfare? “Maybe not”, at least according to one author.

Come on, people. We get it, you’re talented and driven and successful, at least in your own eyes. So let others enjoy their own talent, drive and success, even if it isn’t in a medium or presented within a theme that you enjoy or consider “art”. Let me love what I love and I’ll do the same for you.

Who knows? Maybe Urban Duck Fantasy is the next big thing.

Apparently the answer is “To Twitter”, at least according to the lion’s share of indie authors. A promotional vehicle that runs on a steady fuel of hashtags, bad jokes and shameless plugging yet is somehow STILL surprisingly entertaining. My little heart felt full after creating my first account yesterday and getting my first dozen followers. WHO IS @PARTYINMYPANTS69? I DON’T KNOW BUT THEY’RE FOLLOWING ME SO I LOOOOVE THEM!!! Yeah I’m almost hoping the novelty of this wears off quickly so I can stop feeling like I crave affection from strangers. Or at least, go back to pretending that I don’t crave affection from strangers.

I was a Twitter-doubter for years, which is why I’m so late to this particular party. Why? I’d say it was partially me being too hipster for it, partially me being terrified of drowning in a sea of tweets and partially because I was so snug and comfy under my Facebook blanket. And yet even after that first day I can already tell that this is going to be a pretty big promotional tool in my Bat-Writer utility belt, right next to the shark repellent spray.

If I can get 14 followers in a day (13 now because one doo doo head dropped off overnight) just by being myself and talking about what I love; heck imagine what I can get in a month. I sold several copies of The Pull this week already and it’s only Tuesday. Thank you Twitter, thank you Facebook, thank you YouTube and my blogsite. I’m new to this self-promotion game but I can already see how it can work. The point of this really is: you can too.

Don’t be afraid of Twitter just because people like Charlie Sheen use it to talk about their tiger blood (dated reference is dated) and there are millions of people trying to sell things on it. It can be a fun little playground if you approach it from the right mindset. Don’t be afraid of YouTube because you don’t like your hair on any given day. Just crank up your webcam, open your mouth and say or do something YOU have fun with. When you smile, others smile with you.

I say the more passionate goofballs we have in the social media landscape the better. So get to goofing!!!